My Flight to Australia

At home in Winona.
Madeleine, Rhianon, Nathan and Stephanie with Tessa. Dick, Sue, Rhianon, Stephanie and Madeleine on our wedding day.

On Tuesday October 22 the journey into my past begins, I'm feeling vaguely unsure about seeing in my kids again... it's been forever since I've seen Aaron or Evan, almost as long since I've seen Lisa and James, but Rob visited just this February. I left Winona at 9am and caught a bus to Minneapolis airport. Stephanie, Madeleine and Nathan seemed to take my imminent departure fairly well, Rhianon had tears in her eyes and Dick looked almost as miserable as she did. I feel as though this flight is going to be an eternity.

On the runway at Minneapolis. Not long after take-off.

Its 3 hours since I left Minneapolis, and 11 hours since I left Dick and the kids at The Quality Inn... I miss them all so badly already. It feels so strange to be so far away from everyone in the world that I know. So many things have changed in my life since fate brought me to this country... mostly for the better, but there is the really bad aspect of it, being so far from my older children and their families and missing so much of their lives. Without our journey here I may never have found myself. It was a very hard time in my life with so much heartache and insecurity, but I feel that in a way I needed it to grow and now looking back on the hurt I can see that it strengthened me and my determination. I think of my new home now so far away and wonder what the kids and Dick are doing now, I think of the winding tree lined road to home and wonder if it will be snow covered when I return.

Then my mind turns to Australia and wonder how much things may have changed there. My old home town of Redcliffe was already starting on quite a transformation in the five years or so before I left and I have heard that the process has sped up in the last few years. It will be strange seeing my old homes; the two houses I lived in as a child and then my old home that I moved into when I was just seventeen after saving the deposit to buy it... the home where I raised my babies.

I have to turn off the computer, we are about 15 minutes out of LA. A while ago we passed some snow covered mountains, and back further there were patchwork fields, some white with snow and others brown... maybe unharvested corn or wheat. I quite enjoy flying when I have a window seat, looking down on the Earth with building nothing but specks on the landscape helps put things into perspective. I'm turning the computer off for a while and I'll try to sleep.

Patchwork fields in Nebraska. Sunset above the clouds.

Well I'm back... my computer tells me that it's 2.54 in Winona... I imagine Nathan, and the girls sleeping and Dick alone in our bed and hope that they don't miss me too badly. I can't sleep, maybe later.

When I was sitting in the airport at LA looking at all those strange faces I felt really lonely and missed my family here and there more than ever. I began to wonder why I was making this flight, but I know that when I get to Brisbane I will not need to ask myself that question, I also know that leaving my children, grandchildren, sister, nephew, new in-laws and a newborn grandchild will be hard too. I worry that I will be a stranger to my kids and that I will have changed so much that we won't have much to talk about... maybe I'm worrying too much [as usual] and things will go well and there won't be too many recriminations... Part of me still feels very guilty for leaving them and splitting my family in two, I guess I always will. But I know deep down inside that life would not have been good for any of us if I had stayed, and I doubt that I would have found myself the way I have. I am a better person through this, therefore a better mother to my youngest children than I ever was, or maybe could have been.

I'm finally feeling really sleepy so I'll shutdown the computer for a while.

Well sleep evaded me, my mind is in a turmoil. Wednesday came and went without me seeing the sun, just a few hours of that day and we crossed the dateline into Thursday. I had a few minutes of fitful sleep; for me planes are even worse than hospitals for sleeping... it amazes me how so many people seem to be able to sleep so easily in strange places. It's 6.11 at home, I should just be waking. I hope everyone is alright, Dick looked old when I left yesterday, seeing his face as the bus drove off was worse than seeing Rhianon's.

About to land at Los Angeles. Dawn at Aukland.

This is an eternity... I wonder if the trip home will seem quicker because I don't have any foreboding? The in-flight movies didn't happen, I just checked a while ago and the channels are all working, there are small monitors on the back of the seat on front and a remote control in the arm rest, there are 12 channels with movies, news, sport, weather and even documentaries, but I couldn't be bothered watching. There were also computer games and I played Tetris for a while. We are now half way to Auckland, I'm not sure just how long we are on the ground there, but I have to change seats for the continuing flight to Brisbane. I'm going to do some work on the information for the school, and work on sorting my photos. I'm pleased that I have my laptop with me to help preserve my sanity and achieve some things that need doing.

Thursday's dawn came at Auckland airport. That was all I saw of New Zealand. I bought a duty free power adaptor so I can charge my laptop and camera batteries while I'm in Australia. I walked around the terminal for most of the time while I was there because my legs felt so bad after sitting that long. Back on the plane and an uneventful flight to Brisbane, this was only three hours so I didn't bother with my computer, I watched a documentary on Nano-bacterium, it was very interesting.

Page 1.. My Trip to Australia Page 2.. There at last Page 3, The Wedding Day Page 4, Redcliffe
Page 5, The Gold Coast Page 6, Brisbane Page 7, My trip Home Page 8, Back in Winona